Saturday, May 31, 2008

A Pre-Summer, Mental Health Hiatus

Yo, my peoples, what it do?

Me? I'm hella tired! Do you know I've been writing on here non-stop for like two months straight without a real break? That I've posted like 450 posts since I came on here? I didn't know it would be, but this daily writing bullshit is exhausting.

Not only that, but I found myself getting a lil too attached to this world, letting things in the real world break down and fall apart, and taking it a bit too personal when, recently, there was a "disturbance in the force" out in blog land.

That whole mess was like being in the next room while your parents were arguing, and then having to sit at the dinner table with them and act like you didn't hear the fight... hesitant to ask Mom to pass the green beans because you're afraid she might throw the whole dish in Dad's face. And you just knew divorce was just around the corner. Then one day, you come home from school and there's only one parent there waiting for you... the other has already moved out.

I tried to not let it bother me, but bother me it did, disrupted my peace of mind even. And maybe it was all heightened for me because it's PMS WEEK at Casa Penzo, I'd stopped meditating, had too much on my plate, was getting zero sleep and because I have this NEED in me to fix things, be a peacemaker and make everything OK, but it actually stressed me out when I realized I couldn't do a thing to fix it... I wonder if this is how my kids felt when C and I split up? No wonder K & N are so CUH-RAY-ZEE!

I don't know... maybe I'm just too damn sensitive this time of the month... or those damn pork chops I ate at Nina's are fuckin wit' me still...

Anywayz, that's when I knew it was time to step back and chill in the cut for a bit. Concentrate more on my fiction, my thesis, my journals, hell, maybe even clean my bathroom before the sink up and walks out in protest! And let's not even get into whatever that shriveled up green thing with all that fuzz on it in the crisper of my fridge USED TO be... I believe shit is *actually* mutating in that there crisper... and I think it said something to me in Swahili!! I was kinda shook...

Soooo, The Jaded NYer is taking one of her famous mini-breaks. I think last time it was two weeks, right? Yeah, two weeks sounds about right. I know that last time it was a full-on nervous breakdown, but please be assured that this time it's just a cup of needing to get other shit done with a dash of mental exhaustion. Nothing to write home about.

A moment of silence for my extensive TO DO list and fragile psyche, sponsored by Ms. DiFranco...

...and we're back!

I will probably post pictures from tonight's PAR-TAY at Moe's tomorrow, but after that, you won't hear from me- on this blog or yours (if you have one)- for a good two weeks. That almost seems like blog suicide, right? But it's either that or take to a clock tower somewhere, and my hair hasn't been looking right lately so I don't feel like being on TV. *smile*

Besides, I'll be too busy lounging on the sandy beaches of the cyber equivalent of Tahiti to care. You know I love y'all like Amy Winehouse loves crack, but The Voices and I need some time to regroup and just, oh, I don't know, LIVE ;)

Peace n Hair Grease!
The Jaded NYer

*smooches...looking forward to the silence*
I'm always reachable via email, so if you absolutely NEED to reach me and I don't already know you in real life:


"...just show me a moment that is mine
it's beauty blinding and unsurpassed..."