Wednesday Dedications, 2011: "Apartate De Mi Vida"

Nina and I were on the phone lamenting this hard, hard life we live, and then decided to make ourselves feel better by saying how much harder it could have been had we ended up in the "traditional" roles for Dominican women.

In my alternate universe life, I married a bodeguero, had four kids (Altagracia, Miguelito, Manolo and little Maria) and a Business Administration degree from CCNY, lived in Washington Heights and made empanadas in my apartment to sell on 175th Street and Broadway because my husband wouldn't want me to work (hence the four kids). Then, after my youth had been smothered and squandered under layers of empanada grease, I'd discover that my husband had another family in East NY with a PRican woman. Rat Bastard!

I'd kick him out of the house, but divorce? Never! Instead I'd start wearing clothes that were too small and too revealing and hang out with my bitter, single friends while Manolito got caught up in gang life (damn Trinitarios got to my baby!) and Altagracia got pregnant by some Black dude who thinks Dominican girls are exotic.

In my random, sober moments I'd play some old records, mostly by Fania All-Star artists, and mourn for my youth, self-esteem and confidence, and wonder how it all went to shit so fast. That motherfucking cheating ass bastard and his skanky whore RUINED my family. Eventually, I'd move on, but not before ruining my kids beyond repair.



Still, even as everything crumbled around me, I'd make my empanadas to sell on 175th and Broadway because really- what else do I have at this point? Fuck him!

*smooches...feeling better already*
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turns out this life ain't so bad after all

Wednesday Dedication, 2011: "We Are Drinking Beer At Noon On Tuesday"

This weekend I was lamenting that all my friends are scattered across these United States, and sometimes I go YEARS without seeing the people that I used to see every day.

Like Celia and Cathi, who kept me sane (and out of the ditch) in college. Or Alex, who helped me plan many a caper at Tech. Or Lani, who brought me out of my shell and taught me to bar-dance. Or L who kept me sane (and out of jail) at the Waco School for Girls. Or Mari who, well, actually DID grow up with me and now lives soooooo far away!

Don't get me wrong, I adore the friends I've made since moving back to Brooklyn in 2006, but nothing compares to the people who've known you forever and a day, the people you pretty much grew up with, and have seen you make your ugly crying face. There aren't a lot of people in my life like that.



I can only imagine what one huge party with all my friends would look like. They don't all party in the same fashion with the same kind of people, but I can't help but think that with me as their common denominator, that party would shit on any other party you've ever been to in your life!

*smooches...just for the homies*
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I need to hurry up & get some of that Stephen King money so I can see my people whenever I want!

Wednesday Dedication, 2011: "I Don't Know How To Let You Go"

Anytime I feel low I want to hop on the train and go to you, rest my head on your lap and let you braid my hair until I doze off. I want to wrap my arms around your waist from behind as you stir the food and inhale the Agua Florida you splashed all over yourself that morning. I want to help you hang the wash in the yard while you hum old songs that I'll never know.



I'll never have that again and this knowledge keeps me up at night.

*smooches...feeling that void again*
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just when you think you're over something, you're not.

Wednesday Dedication, 2011: "Don't Let Me Fall In Love With You Again"

I still get butterflies at the thought of you. I need you to know that, but not really. It's beyond time I let go of my crush although I sense there will be no end in sight. To me, you are still the bees' knees.

Maybe one day I'll get to rest my head in the crook of your neck and breathe you in again. Maybe our lips will meet again. Maybe I'll get to stare into your beautiful chestnut eyes and melt away... again.



Maybe...

*smooches...fighting the feeling*
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my thug status is in jeopardy...over a freakin DUDE, son!