Friday, May 16, 2008

Seven Days And Counting: Tagged Again!

Dominicano extraordinaire, Brother Omi, tagged me, and only because I feel like we're compadres (really- that Island is so small it's quite possible that somewhere down the line we could be related) will I comply. Except I won't tag anyone, lest I be tagged again :)

So... y'all know the rules... six quirks. I think last time I did six FACTS instead, you know because I'm a rebel like that, but this time I'll play by the rules:

Six Things About Me That Will Make You Want To Call Bellvue On My Behalf:

1- When I eat, I need to have on my plate, something hot, something cold, something bland, something spicy and/or salty, something soft and something crunchy. If all of those criteria aren't met, I feel like I haven't eaten anything. A sample meal would be something like rice (bland, hot, soft), turkey chili (salty, spicy, hot), cole slaw w/out mayo (cold, crunchy) and avacado slices (bland, soft). Damn, now I'm hungry.

2- I adjust my accent/way of speaking depending on who's talking to me. It's kinda weird! I'm like a speech chameleon... like, I'll have a Southern drawl or a West Indian accent, and then of course at home it's straight Spanglish, and at work I have my "white voice"... although lately, since I've moved back to Brooklyn, I noticed it's been more ghetto than not!

3- As a kid, I assigned genders to each letter of the alphabet and each number as such:

FEMALES: A,B,D,K,P,R,S,V,X,Y,Z & 2,4,6,7,8
MALES: C,E,F,G,H,I,J,L,M,N,O,T,U,W & 0,1,3,5,9

We had those letter and number refrigerator magnets, (remember those?) and I'd play with them as if they were dolls or characters (no pun intended)... if I recall correctly, S and T were related, 5 was a casanova, and Z was a nun... don't ask...

4- NO ONE IS ALLOWED TO TOUCH ME BELOW MY CALF- NO EXCEPTIONS. It was hella hard to get a tattoo on my lower leg because of it; it was even harder to get that pedicure with Irene last year, too. I have an aversion to being touched, period, but especially there... as a kid I had crazy skinny legs, and my ankles were like non-existent. One day I looked in the mirror and thought to myself: Oh my god... my ankles are too skinny! How are they even holding me up? They're gonna snap!! As irrational as that may sound, I can't get that thought out of my head, so touching my lower leg is like nails on a chalkboard to me, and WILL earn you a right hook to the jaw!

5- As I type, if I make a mistake, I have to erase everything that came after the mistake and start over, even if it means going back to the beginning of a paragraph. I cannot physically bring myself to let a typo go, and LORD NO I cannot drag the cursor to the error, fix it, and pick up where I left off- that's blasphamous!!! It's like, if I erase everything that happened after the mistake PLUS the mistake, then it never happened and I can still believe myself to be perfect. CONFESSION: because of this, sometimes it takes me at minimum two hours to write even the tiniest of blog posts.

6- The last thing I drink everyday has to be water... I don't like to have the lingering flavors of whatever I just ate or drank in my mouth- it drives me insane. So I'll chase a candy bar with water, a glass of orange juice with water, anything; it must have a water chaser!

So there you go, 6 quirks. Make sure you took good notes; this will be on the final...

*smooches...pretty sure my crazy beats your crazy any day of the week*
what you gotta say about that? huh?