Friday, November 14, 2008

%$&* With A Side Of @%$&&$&

So... my ex-husband asked to be added as a friend on Facebook.

When I first saw the request in my email I was like HUH? WHAT FOR?? and then proceeded to ignore it for a few days. Then I casually mentioned it to K and she was like, "You have to add him; if you don't he'll be hurt."

And I was like, "Kid, you're smoking crack! That man does NOT care what I do! Plus my blog is listed there and I talk about him on it sometimes."

To which she replied, "Please! Daddy knows you talk about him!"

Then she kept at it and I caved (between you and me? That girl knows EXACTLY how to wrap me around her finger sometimes... I must find an antidote before she turns 16!) so I add him, whatever, and when Irene sees it she's like: ACK! Oh no! C-man is on Facebook now. Is nowhere safe?

And THEN she points out that some of the stuff I've written about him, especially in most recent months, might hurt his feelings so I may want to take down my blog link from FB.


Now I can't have my blog link up because somebody's feelings might get hurt? UGH!!

Do you see what I mean now about exes coming out of woodwork n shit? This one googles me, another stops me on the street, one adds me on MySpace and now THIS ONE friends me on FB. And don't EVEN get me started on the one who texts me at 2AM talking about "Hey you! Watchu doing?" IS NOTHING SACRED?

All that's missing now is for one to rent the empty apartment next door, another to start working out at my gym, and yet another to get a job at my firm. Then I will know that the Universe is definitely out to get me.

Honestly, it's my own fault for wanting to be "on good terms" with everyone... I should just be an awful, nasty, devil-bitch to every guy I break up with so that they will hate me forever and NEVER EVER get the idea: "Hey, I wonder what Rocky is up to? Let me google her and find out..."

*smooches...definitely, absolutely, without a doubt NOT changing a word in any of my posts*
all the parties involved will just have to suck it up and DEAL! This here is MY blog, and if they don't like it, they are more than welcome to start a blog of their own!! HMPH!