Tuesday, November 13, 2007

The First Sign of the Apocalypse!!

OH SH*T YA'LL!!!!!

It's time to stop playing around and repent for real-for real. God is mad as hell and he's not gonna take it anymore.

Check out this item I read in the news wire from DR:


Running out of plantains

Diario Libre is reporting that plantains, which are an important part of the Dominican diet, are beginning to run out, causing prices to skyrocket.

At Avenida Duarte's Mercado Nuevo only five truckloads of plantains had arrived, with prices ranging from RD$4 to RD$10 per unit. Diario Libre is reporting an incident where two men drew their guns in a dispute over plantains.

At the Mercado Modelo only two vendors had plantains, selling them for RD$10 per unit, and even cassava prices are inflating with each unit rising to RD$12 in some cases. Farmers say that the rain caused by Tropical Storm Noel ruined a large part of the plantain crop and that increased shortages are likely.

Plantains were available at supermarkets this week for prices ranging from RD$5 to RD$10 per unit.

WTF?!?! We're running out of platanos? HUH? I'm sorry, I'm not understanding this... how can we run out? How will we survive? And if platanos are costing an arm and a leg in DR, what the hell are they going to cost in Washington Heights?

Just be prepared: Dominicans are gonna be walking around in a daze for a lil bit, so please be patient with your bodega owner, waiter, hairdresser, gypsy cab driver, and friendly neighborhood blogger...

*smooches...hording bags of Chifles plantain chips in the storm cellar*
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seriously, this is no
laughing matter! it's
gonna ruin
Thanksgiving!