Monday, May 28, 2012

"Don't Judge Me Monkey."

I've been looking forward to my birthday weekend all month and this weekend it was FINALLY here- dinner at La Casa de Mofongo and dancing at El Morocco- yes, partying in da Heights!- were on the menu!

I left the house and said to myself, "I'm gonna have a great night out! I'll only have a couple of drinks. I'm Healthy Jaded now, and Healthy Jaded doesn't do shots or Irish car bombs or grain alcohol-soaked fruit. Healthy Jaded is mature and cares about her liver's well-being." Everything was super cool. I had dinner with my family, one tiny tequila shot and lots of water. And I looked amazing!

I'm sexy and I know it!
Then two double-shots of whiskey happened, courtesy of Eb the Celeb, and a hookah that I swear had some kush in it, and it was all downhill from there.

That hookah was laced!
"No pictures!"

The cab-hair struggle is REAL

Legs were done at this point...
...but notice how shapely they are, though!

Yes, I slept on my kitchen floor. And your point is?

*smooches...another year older but none the wiser*
next year I'm renting a cottage at the Vineyard and calling it a day!