But this year I relented because it was my cousin’s birthday and he was DJ-ing at a spot on E. Houston. It took me forever to actually get motivated to leave Brooklyn because I was nursing my ego after being rejected by yet ANOTHER literary magazine, but I grabbed a partner in crime and got there at about 1AM. My costume? I dressed as a 35-year-old mother of two who was ripped from her comfy couch and Law & Order: SVU marathon to deal with drunken fools in the street *side eye*
At first I was annoyed because the trains were acting up and then THIS:

But once I got to the bar I met up with a cute, flirty bouncer, another cousin was there, too, and then THIS:

And this:

Aaaaannnnnnnnd THIS:

It was allllll downhill from there.
I got home at 7AM. Need I say more?
*smooches...still tired from Saturday night*
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I think my body was so tired that it summoned my period a whole week early to punish me!
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