Friday, August 12, 2011

Classic Fridays, 2011: Telenovelas

Every once in a while, I like to do something a little different, like choose themes for random months and challenge myself to stick with the theme throughout. For this month, I'm taking y'all back. WAY back. To when Jaded was a little girl, stuck indoors while other kids played outside, attempting to stay sane by drowning in music, television and books.

Before I learned to speak English, Spanish was the only language in my world. Mostly because Grandma and Papi raised us while our mothers worked, but also in part to what was on television while we were home. Telenovelas.

I challenge you to find a Latino household that doesn't partake of this guilty pleasure! When I was little eight o'clock could not come fast enough, because that's when they aired all the juiciest shows: Cristal, Las Amazonas and Karina (these were all on TV at different stages of my life, but remain among my favorite shows).

The best part about novelas is that they had a beginning and an end. It was basically a very loooooooong mini-series. And the best ones came from Delia Fiallo and were from Venezuela. Those bitchez knew the ins and outs of some good ass serial dramas! All the stories were a variation of:

Poor, beautiful girl w/out parents
She meets a rich, handsome man, who also falls for her
His family is vehemently opposed to the relationship
The man is betrothed to a bitch rich girl arranged by his parents
The poor, beautiful girl finds some sort of success or financial gain
She's finally at their level, might have even found her parents
A whole bunch of other shit happens
Poor, beautiful girl + rich, handsome man live happily ever after
It's predictable but sooooo addictive and fun! I love Cristal the best. It's the only one I caught from beginning to end. Basically, Cristina is a poor, beautiful, orphan who dreams of becoming a model. She lives with two other women- the gold-digging Inocencia and the bookish Zoraida. She's eventually hired to model for Casa Victoria, run by [DRAMATIC PAUSE] HER MOTHER, VICTORIA! And she falls in love with Victoria's step-son, Luis Alfredo, but Victoria is all, "Oh no you don't, BIATCH!" and squashes the whole shit, mainly because she discovers her husband, Alejandro, is having an affair with Cristina's roommate, Inocencia. CHILD...drama!

I won't ruin the rest of the story for you, but here's a poorly dubbed clip to wet your whistle (and please bow down to Rudy La Scala and that kick ass theme song, bitchezzz. That used to be my SONG!):

If anyone knows of the box set on DVD, hook a sistah up!

*smooches...remembering happier times*
cookies, milk and novelas; that used to be my whole world!