Friday, October 27, 2006

Five BMW's on Front Street?

Brooklyn is getting too trendy for me!

I'm in DUMBO (Down Under the Manhattan Bridge Overpass for you non-NYers) today and not only are there swanky little design studios and antique furniture shops and a Starbucks (ugh), but the cars parked along the street look like refugees from Park Avenue. What is happening to my cute little boro?

Last year when I was desperately trying to find an apartment I found that I couldn't afford my old Bed-Stuy (now called Stuyvesant Heights) nabe anymore. And this is the same place where crack vials littered the streets like rainbow sprinkles on an ice cream cone. You should have seen some of the crap going for almost $1500/month- with a credit check and 3 months UP FRONT! I was at my wit's end. So I ended up here in Boro Park/Kensington/Greenwood (who the fuck knows anymore! Real estate people must have too much time on their hands since they've been reduced to renaming sections of Brooklyn to make a higher profit!). And it's not bad- rather quiet and quaint- but I wanted to bring my kids to the HEART of it, you know? Where I grew up. A place with "color" and sazon, not the melonin-challenged outdoor cafe parade it has become. I mean really, since when did Ethopian cuisine become the must-have cuisine on Dekalb Avenue? Whatever happen to the Cuban-Chinese joints? And Tony's Famous Pizza on Tompkins? And anyway, I thought Ethopians were starving- how can they have a "cuisine"?

$1500 a month...situated right across the street from the projects...that woman was out of her goddamn mind!

And it's not just DUMBO and Bed-Stuy; Bushwick- where a Puerto-Rican will cut you on site just cuz- is also feeling the burn; Williamsburg...let me not even get started on what "they" (ya'll know who I'm talking about...don't make me say it...) have done to this place. It's getting so bad that soon really really poor ghetto folk like myself will have to move to, GULP, Newark!!!

I expect this kind of behavior from the 212, but the 718? What's this world coming to?

*smooches...from some new, swanky Brooklyn enclave*
we got it rehashed
we got it half-assed
we're digging up all the graves
and we're spitting on the past