Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Trying On a New Orange Jumpsuit...

And so it begins.

I got a disturbing phone call from the parents of K's best friend to discuss some inappropriate messages that K left on her friend's phone. I won't list the details here out of respect for K's privacy, but needless to say, I was two minutes from shoving my foot so far up her ass she'd be tasting suede Sketchers for months!

When I confronted her she admitted to a few of the allegations, but not all of them, so now I have to meet with the friend's parents and hear the messages for myself. You know, before I shove my foot in her ass for no reason.

I don't think I need to explain to any of you how far and wide my wrath soared last night. Probably on your way to dry the dishes or go to bed, you felt an odd chill deep down in your core and wasn't sure what it was. It was me, telling K in no uncertain terms that her credibility with me is shot to hell, and that any privilege she ever had is now nothing more than a distant memory. Cell phone? What's that? Computers? TV? As far as K is concerned, they haven't been invented yet.

This child is absolutely lucky that I've started meditating and learning to find my inner peace in times of inner turmoil, because the old Raquel would have gotten a belt, went to town on that ass and asked questions later...on our way to DR so that my grandfather can teach her a little about "old school discipline."

And I hate to admit it, but this is total Karmic payback for all the shyt I pulled as a kid. I know, I know, you're shocked, but yeah I wasn't the sweet angel I've led you all to believe I was, and when I got caught, BOY was there hell to pay. In fact, it still kinda hurts to sit down...

To all of you out there sans children, thank your lucky stars tonight. I envy you all. I know the old adage goes: the grass is always greener... but in this case, the grass is not only greener, but it's perfectly manicured and is blooming beautiful red roses. Whereas my grass just grew a few more grey hairs and earned some yucky frown lines.

*smooches...one step closer to becoming my mom*
Oh, mirror in the sky
What is love
Can the child within my heart rise above
Can I sail thru the changing ocean tides
Can I handle the seasons of my life