Friday, April 04, 2014

Back In The Saddle Again: A Healthy Jaded Update

I was tempted to not label this a Healthy Jaded update, because I'm anything BUT healthy. As I type this, my chair is struggling to hold up all 200lbs of me. Yes, 200lbs. Remember when I was so happy to have finally reached the 170s? It feels like eons ago that I wore a two-piece for the first time since my teen years. And now, now I look as if Mari and Irene should be throwing me a baby shower next month.

How did I get here (again)? So many little reasons that basically add up to: I have no healthy coping skills for stressful situations and life's disappointments. For me, it's always food that soothes me, and that can be as addictive and dangerous as whatever the drug du jour is that kids are stockpiling.

I've been here before. 200lbs is always my "rock bottom" where I realize that this could easily double if I don't do something right this minute. I don't want to be featured on "My 600lb Life" or have to show my gut on "The Biggest Loser." I think it really hit me when a certain gentleman caller asked me out and I told him I was too fat to be seen.  Ridiculous, right? But this is where I am.

So now it's time to take action before I end up as the obese, bitter, crazy old lady at the end of the block that kids try and mess with on Halloween. I'm a bit more limited in what I can do physically these days, but my favorite activities are still okay, like dancing and swimming. Yoga...well, my PT was on the fence about yoga, and that made me sad. However, if I can strengthen my core some then MAYBE I'll get the green light to go back in the studio and downward dog my stress away.

In the meantime, I will take advantage of the people around me who live, breathe and eat FITNESS and WELLNESS, and start back on a better path. Forty is too close for comfort; I can't greet it with this fake baby belly.

*smooches...hoping this is the last time I start over*
my poor body can't take much more abuse!