Monday, October 22, 2012

172.6: A Healthy Jaded Update

I wasn't going to write this post until after I met with the GYN surgeon about my fibroids, but why wait for depressing news when we can discuss my great news instead?

For about a month, I've been meeting with a personal trainer twice a week. Coupled with this GOD AWFUL detox cleanse I've been on for the past two weeks, it appears that, while my uterus situation hasn't changed, I've dropped almost 10 pounds!

That's right, folks- even though I've cheated on this cleanse here and there, and I've yet to get to the gym except for the training sessions I have with Señor Evil Trainer Meany Face, I managed to get oh-so-close to the 160s, which is my fitness dream come true. I mean, you guys can't even imagine how excited I am to be at the precipice of dropping a dress size and some inches! But let's not get ahead of ourselves...lets just relish in this 172.6 reading from the Stupid Idiot Scale that I found hidden in my room (I thought I had thrown it out months ago!).

What has helped: clearly the training. Not only is it forcing me to stay on budget (read: cut back on takeout since I can no longer afford it) but having that one-on-one help from Señor Evil Trainer Meany Face has really maximized my time in the gym. It's also taught me that

a) crying is OK, but it's not going to sway Señor Evil Trainer Meany Face one bit. He will still make you finish all your reps and not even offer you a tissue!

b) when you work out so hard that you feel vomity, trainers think it's funny.

c) my body can do so much more than I give it credit for.

d) my core? It's weaker than a motherfucker. And

e) thirty minutes feels like thirty hours when you're balancing on a Bosu ball while lifting weights and squatting. But these new sneakers helped!

Great support AND a Vibram sole!

Other things that have helped:

a) wanting to look good naked. Who doesn't want this?

b) fear of the diabetes that killed my grandmother (this fear has fueled my motivation).

c) Cathi's upcoming wedding; I must look FLY for my Boston White Boys!

d) eating better. I can't deny it; it helps. And

e) knowing if anything is wrong with your insides. I'll explain--

I was told that my liver enzymes were a bit elevated and that I was Vitamin D deficient; this is a direct result of a poor diet, which I'm working on. I was also informed that I have a slightly deviated septum AND that I still have my adenoids (you're not supposed to have them anymore as an adult); this means I have to be sure I'm using my neti pot every night AND that my environment is clean as a whistle.

Once you get these results from the doctor you can't UN-know them, and you are pretty much compelled to do something about it and take better care of yourself. Which is what I'm doing.

No six-pack or Kardashian booty, but MUCH improved!

And the results have been FAB!

*smooches...inches away from wearing a carnival costume to work*
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you know I will...