Two years ago I agreed to a new contract with my boss at the PR firm which would allow me to freelance for him and his clients as opposed to being a salaried employee chained to a desk all day. At the time I was severely unhappy at this job and welcomed the opportunity to not have to deal with these people face to face anymore. YES, working from home in my pajamas for [insert hourly rate], Alex!
Immediately after I also signed on for two other paying freelance gigs and figured it was time to do the unthinkable: buy a smartphone. You all remember Phillip (may he rest in peace), yes? Yeah, he was cool, as was his replacement, Esteban, until they weren't.
So I crunched the numbers, analyzed the pros and cons and finally had to make some hard decisions to improve my bottom line. Esteban had to be laid off.
As of Monday, October 10, I will cancel my fourth phone line, shut down my Blackberry smartphone and begin to enjoy life without having the entire internet stuck at my hip 24 hours a day.
Sure I'll miss its convenience and all, but the truth is, I'm not faring too well in this era of extreme accessibility. I like being able to escape, stay under the radar, fall into the background. All of this is hard to do when the whole world has access to you and vice versa.
First of all, the freelance gigs dried up and I found myself using the phone more for fun than for work. Sudoku and Brick Breaker kept me company on long commutes. I became obsessed with checking emails every waking minute. And don't even get me started on how much stuff I missed because I was mobile tweeting or BBMing more than I was living or working!
Then my phone bills started to come in and I almost died of a heart attack. With FOUR phone lines my monthly statements were nearly $230- completely unacceptable for someone who's living paycheck-to-paycheck like me.
And finally, the damn thing proved to be pretty crappy, volatile and prone to bugs and breakage at an alarming rate. I can't even tell you how many times I've had to pull the battery out and reboot the damn phone. I mean, is it too much to ask that a machine that costs me almost $50 a month in fees WORK when I need it to WORK?
In 2006, I decided to not get a television for my new apartment. In 2011, I've decided to not have a smartphone. Some may see this as moving backwards; I see it as taking back my life. When the Robot Invasion takes place, you'll all wish you'd followed my lead...
*smooches...wondering how long before I toss out my computer*
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SIKE! as much as I hate to admit it I actually NEED a computer. BOOOOO!
Thursday, October 06, 2011
Wednesday, October 05, 2011
Inappropriate BBMs, Vol. 7
"It's a sad day when you can't eat a girl out without having to worry about cancer."
*smooches...wondering why I keep these friends around*
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actually, it's really helping me with blog material so...
*smooches...wondering why I keep these friends around*
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actually, it's really helping me with blog material so...
Tuesday, October 04, 2011
Future Babies On A Shelf
Remember when I said I had baby fever and that nothing would please me more to have another squooshy-wooshy baby or two to add to my already awesome pair of babies?
::checks in with biological clock::
Well, it doesn't look like it's going to happen and I'm about 65% okay with it. I can only hope that as the years go on and other babies are born into the family, I'll let go of the dream of another rugrat. Because let's be real here: by the time I meet someone that I'll actually want to spend the rest of my life with, marry him and then decide to have a baby, I'll be well into my 40s. And once you're in your 40s the risks of having a troubled pregnancy are higher than I want to deal with.
See, the first time around I had an OOPS pregnancy, followed by a DISTRACT MY DEPRESSION pregnancy with a man that I didn't love. As the girls got older I had this desire to do it all again, this time with a partner I cherished. In my mind there was this vision of us in our home with a toddler following K and N around with adoration in its eyes, and them spoiling it rotten, and all of us waiting for the OTHER baby to be born. Two more. That's all I wanted. Little Gracie & Nigel to round out the motley crew of Jaded babies in the world.
But alas, I've had to wave goodbye to that dream. I'm 36. Already my eggs are 36-years-old. I have fibroids and scarring from an ectopic pregnancy. And I hate doctors and chances are no one will OK me having a late-in-life baby with a midwife.
Part of me wishes I hadn't wasted all that time after my divorce fucking around, literally. All that shoulda-woulda-coulda is not good for The Voices, though, so I'm just going to chalk it up to a lesson learned and wait for Mari to start churning out my nieces and nephews. Plural.
However, once I repair this flux capacitor, it's ON!
*smooches...planning mischievous outings for Mari's kids*
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oh, they WILL be spoiled. bank on that!
::checks in with biological clock::
Well, it doesn't look like it's going to happen and I'm about 65% okay with it. I can only hope that as the years go on and other babies are born into the family, I'll let go of the dream of another rugrat. Because let's be real here: by the time I meet someone that I'll actually want to spend the rest of my life with, marry him and then decide to have a baby, I'll be well into my 40s. And once you're in your 40s the risks of having a troubled pregnancy are higher than I want to deal with.
See, the first time around I had an OOPS pregnancy, followed by a DISTRACT MY DEPRESSION pregnancy with a man that I didn't love. As the girls got older I had this desire to do it all again, this time with a partner I cherished. In my mind there was this vision of us in our home with a toddler following K and N around with adoration in its eyes, and them spoiling it rotten, and all of us waiting for the OTHER baby to be born. Two more. That's all I wanted. Little Gracie & Nigel to round out the motley crew of Jaded babies in the world.
But alas, I've had to wave goodbye to that dream. I'm 36. Already my eggs are 36-years-old. I have fibroids and scarring from an ectopic pregnancy. And I hate doctors and chances are no one will OK me having a late-in-life baby with a midwife.
Part of me wishes I hadn't wasted all that time after my divorce fucking around, literally. All that shoulda-woulda-coulda is not good for The Voices, though, so I'm just going to chalk it up to a lesson learned and wait for Mari to start churning out my nieces and nephews. Plural.
However, once I repair this flux capacitor, it's ON!
*smooches...planning mischievous outings for Mari's kids*
----------
oh, they WILL be spoiled. bank on that!
Monday, October 03, 2011
Washed Away
Last week I was trying to shop for produce to feed my family and was utterly disappointed at the prices I had to endure. I mean, $4 for some cauliflower just didn't seem right! And don't even get me started on the price of tomatoes and cucumbers; just appalling!
Color me stupid, however, when I was sent a link to a video about a couple of farms Upstate that had been completely ruined by Hurricane Irene. I had heard that it was bad up there but I was not aware how bad until I saw the videos.
This all tied in to my planned visit Upstate this past weekend; Celia had already warned me that it might take longer to get to her house because the usual roads were gone. GONE. As in the flooding was so bad that it just up and stole the goddamn roads away. Of course you hear stuff like that and your eyes widen with shock and you say things like "Wow!" or "Oh my god that's terrible!" but it isn't real to you, because all that happened on your block during that storm was that a few branches fell on your stairs. OH, THE HUMANITY!
But then you read stories like this and you realize this is a motherfucking DISASTER the likes you've never had to experience. Except now you're experiencing because this is your home state and those farms help feed your lazy, City ass but now they're gone.
Then it all get really real when you drive through Prattsville and you see this:
When I think back to the storm weekend, and how much people complained about the City being shut down and how Bloomberg overreacted and how it was all for nothing I couldn't believe it- did you want something bad to happen? You're mad because our elected officials were trying to avoid a repeat of Snowmaggedon 2010?? And now I want to say to those same people, how dare you moan and whine and complain when that hurricane devastated many whole towns! I saw those uprooted homes with my own eyes. I saw the residents of that town drinking their troubles away at a local bar, and Celia overheard one of them say they plan to rebuild in six months- completely impossible but who's about to squash this man's hopes and dreams? Really, once this all becomes real it's hard to unsee and unhear about the tragedies.
When I think of how lucky we were in the City to not have suffered that fate... and how tragic the situation has become for these small, impoverished towns of Upstate New York, it really put things in perspective. I shop for food with only my wallet in mind, and sometimes, when you live paycheck-to-paycheck like I do you have to shop like that. But I never stop to think where my cauliflower and tomatoes come from, and how hard those farmers work to yield a big enough crop to feed us City folk, who then turn around and complain about the price of tomatoes as we sit upon our fancy digs. I don't think about the people they employ, the animals they have to feed and the myriad of bureaucratic red tape they have to deal with in order to keep their family businesses afloat.
I wish I could do more than donate money to help them out, but if that's the only weapon at my disposal right now, so be it. I'm not the pushy money-asking type, but if it at all moves you, maybe you can donate some money, too?
UPDATE: Just read a post on the Green In BKLYN website that gives you more ways to donate money or food, diapers and other basic necessities to the families who need it. So if you don't have money but you stocked up on non-perishables prior to the storm that you're not using, consider dropping them off at one of the green markets around the City. I'll be your best friend if you do!
*smooches...wishing these families all the best*
----------
if I made even 1% more people aware of this situation and that 1% tells another 1%...
Color me stupid, however, when I was sent a link to a video about a couple of farms Upstate that had been completely ruined by Hurricane Irene. I had heard that it was bad up there but I was not aware how bad until I saw the videos.
This all tied in to my planned visit Upstate this past weekend; Celia had already warned me that it might take longer to get to her house because the usual roads were gone. GONE. As in the flooding was so bad that it just up and stole the goddamn roads away. Of course you hear stuff like that and your eyes widen with shock and you say things like "Wow!" or "Oh my god that's terrible!" but it isn't real to you, because all that happened on your block during that storm was that a few branches fell on your stairs. OH, THE HUMANITY!
But then you read stories like this and you realize this is a motherfucking DISASTER the likes you've never had to experience. Except now you're experiencing because this is your home state and those farms help feed your lazy, City ass but now they're gone.
Then it all get really real when you drive through Prattsville and you see this:
When I think back to the storm weekend, and how much people complained about the City being shut down and how Bloomberg overreacted and how it was all for nothing I couldn't believe it- did you want something bad to happen? You're mad because our elected officials were trying to avoid a repeat of Snowmaggedon 2010?? And now I want to say to those same people, how dare you moan and whine and complain when that hurricane devastated many whole towns! I saw those uprooted homes with my own eyes. I saw the residents of that town drinking their troubles away at a local bar, and Celia overheard one of them say they plan to rebuild in six months- completely impossible but who's about to squash this man's hopes and dreams? Really, once this all becomes real it's hard to unsee and unhear about the tragedies.
When I think of how lucky we were in the City to not have suffered that fate... and how tragic the situation has become for these small, impoverished towns of Upstate New York, it really put things in perspective. I shop for food with only my wallet in mind, and sometimes, when you live paycheck-to-paycheck like I do you have to shop like that. But I never stop to think where my cauliflower and tomatoes come from, and how hard those farmers work to yield a big enough crop to feed us City folk, who then turn around and complain about the price of tomatoes as we sit upon our fancy digs. I don't think about the people they employ, the animals they have to feed and the myriad of bureaucratic red tape they have to deal with in order to keep their family businesses afloat.
I wish I could do more than donate money to help them out, but if that's the only weapon at my disposal right now, so be it. I'm not the pushy money-asking type, but if it at all moves you, maybe you can donate some money, too?
UPDATE: Just read a post on the Green In BKLYN website that gives you more ways to donate money or food, diapers and other basic necessities to the families who need it. So if you don't have money but you stocked up on non-perishables prior to the storm that you're not using, consider dropping them off at one of the green markets around the City. I'll be your best friend if you do!
*smooches...wishing these families all the best*
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if I made even 1% more people aware of this situation and that 1% tells another 1%...
Sunday, October 02, 2011
Jaded Photographs: October 2011 Edition
"Cuatro"
*smooches...planning for #5*
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yes, it's addictive. yes, it hurts. yes, the after-care is annoying.
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