I'm what's called an "emotional eater" and when I'm stressed I eat, but when I'm down I don't.
Lately I've been more stressed than down, and now my pants are kinda snug. Actually, no, not kinda, VERY... my pants are VERY snug.
For a teeny, tiny, split second, I entertained getting a jump start on losing weight by doing one of those cleansing fasts or whatever they're called, but then I remembered that I like eating real solid food.
So then I figured, I'll just eat less calories... which became a problem because I normally don't like to eat breakfast, so by the time lunch comes around, my stomach pulls one of these numbers:
and I'm forced to eat more in one sitting than I normally should. It's become a serious problem.
Finally, my other internal organs begged me, "for the love of GOD, woman, EAT BREAKFAST... our very lives depend on it!!!"
So now I do. I ate breakfast all this week.
I mean, who wants to deal with a cannibalistic, homicidal stomach? How do you even explain that to the cops? Yeah, I'm too pretty to go to jail...
*smooches...wondering how much longer I can keep this up*
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I really loathe eating in the morning. it just doesn't seem natural... and who's hungry at 7AM? not me, that's who... but everything I read on nutrition says eating breakfast is important, so, ARGH!!! I'm eating the fakakta breakfast...
but then I remembered that I like eating real solid food.
ReplyDeleteToo funny.
Matter of fact the entire post was funny, especially the Rembrandt. LOL. Always enjoy seeing your zany drawings. But yeah eat breakfast, I think it's the most important meal of the day besides lunch and dinner.
LOL.
your drawings are great. Always remember
ReplyDelete"Your body needs breakfast, so eat that shyt"
lol @ that drawing.
ReplyDeletebreakfast IS essential.
i'm proud of you chica.
because i'm also one of those people that have to FORCE myself to eat breakfast. but only because if i didn't, the first chance i'd get to eat for the day would be around 4:30 in the afternoon.
and i don't want a homicidal stomach either. lol.
I just realized something, your drawing almost puts me in the mind of an old video game called BurgerTime.
ReplyDeleteI don't eat breakfast or lunch so by the time i get home i have a really big dinner and stuff myself likes it's my last meal, so yes i can relate...i have a apple cinnamon Nutri- Grain bar in my purse, maybe i should eat it....
ReplyDeletethe picture is too much for me to handle during work hours! lmao
I thought that bike you got was for things like this.
ReplyDelete@don- thanks... that drawing came to me one day as my stomach grumbled loudly and I realized it was 3PM and I hadn't eaten a thing all day. NOT. CUTE!
ReplyDelete@super dave- that video can be used for so many lessons...
@muze- I had a trainer tell me once: "Eat rice and beans for breakfast if you want, just east SOMETHING!" lol
@don- I remember that game! I wasn't very good at it though lol
@sexxy luv- it makes a difference; I've only been doing it for 5 days and I've noticed that I don't overeat as much anymore
@clnmike- the bike is for exercise, true, but it doesn't help if I'm gonna eat enough for 5 people! lol
Ish, today must be the longest day of the year...*sigh*
ReplyDeleteanyways, I found this video of a young carlos santana, thought you'd enjoy:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GatQ-dHiLWo&feature=related
clnmike: The bike is for pushing to the subway, silly - not for exercising.
ReplyDeleteI think you've gotta eat...or...do that thing called...exercise. Haaaa
ReplyDeleteyou know i like to eat so when you are on the side that keeps you from eating.. holla at me cuz I will join ya and help ya...
ReplyDeletealso call when your on the side when your eating too much... because I will join you then too.. find a buffet or something to hit up...lol
@don- it's 6PM and I'm still here so I feel ya!
ReplyDelete@jack- keep it up, carajo!!
@12kyle- *side eye*
@eb- girl you are NOT helping!!! lol
Hey Sistah!
ReplyDeleteYou are soooo funny! I so feel you on the emotional eating thing...I needed Jesus on this matter like 25years ago...but it ain't too late to call on him for help!!
"Lawd, Jesus please help me I admit I'm an emotional eater and I need your help. p.s. can you help my sistah Jaded NYer too? Thanks"
I eat when I'm stressed too (don't curse me out...yeah I know it doesn't show) But...you don't have to eat large meals. That early in the morning, I drink orange juice or eat a banana. A few hours later, I will eat something else. Eating several small meals may benefit you!
ReplyDeleteand yes anything other than a cold glass of water in the morning sounds very disgusting to me... very... but then by 7 p.m I would want to eat a toddler
ReplyDeleteSo I've been to this thing called boot camp *cough cough* and I after three sessions hmm lose pants, yes! I decided that I will do the ore intense one that Shelly Shell does as soon as the drama ends!
ReplyDeleteBut if you are the anti-exerciser than try Dr. Ian's fat smasher 9 days of detox :) There goes the water weight.
I hate eating breakfast also because I don't get hungry until 11am (I wake up at 5:30 every morning). So now I try to eat cereal or instant oatmeal by 8am. It sucks big time though!
ReplyDeletesuccess
ReplyDeleteanother great illustration
diets are for quitters, dear jaded one.
viva la trans fat !
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